Sometimes, at a certain point on our spiritual path, we may develop a tendency to hide in samadhi, praying for a last minute "hail mary" pass to save us from the discomfort of our circumstances. We may have gotten very good at dropping into a deep & altered state of consciousness, despite the messiness of our lives, and we may think that this means we are touching enlightenment. But then we inevitably have to get up to go to the store or the job & we have to encounter the actual circumstances of our reality, which may not feel like the "peace" of samadhi at all. In fact it may feel as confusing as hell.
So we run back inside & retreat from the world thinking "if I can just get peaceful enough in here then surely it will begin to influence all of the chaos out there". But there really is no "in here" & "out there" & so the longer we hide in samadhi the messier the "out there" often gets. So what do we do then?
There are myriad teachings available right now that tell us how to "think positively" to "visualize what we really want" to "listen to our heart not our head" to "be love" to............ Finally, after days or years or decades of grasping after these pretty pictures, we may find ourselves despondent & befuddled yet again by the apparent circumstances of our lives. And it is here that our true gift resides, waiting for us to finally drop to our knees in exhaustion. This Gift does not want our submission, it simply wants us to try being here, to try not running away from our lives & ourselves.
And so I say ~ step out into the messiness & see it for what it is. For it is not uncommon for our liberation to show itself in the midst of our despondency rather than our bliss. Bliss often feeds the desire for more bliss & thus perpetuates the outer search. Yet in the heart of this hopelessness is the chance to glimpse what has been here all along, if only we will not turn away from it. Find out what is within you, what is you, lying in the heart of your discomfort. There is no where left to search....there is nothing more to do....nothing more to say........
So we run back inside & retreat from the world thinking "if I can just get peaceful enough in here then surely it will begin to influence all of the chaos out there". But there really is no "in here" & "out there" & so the longer we hide in samadhi the messier the "out there" often gets. So what do we do then?
There are myriad teachings available right now that tell us how to "think positively" to "visualize what we really want" to "listen to our heart not our head" to "be love" to............ Finally, after days or years or decades of grasping after these pretty pictures, we may find ourselves despondent & befuddled yet again by the apparent circumstances of our lives. And it is here that our true gift resides, waiting for us to finally drop to our knees in exhaustion. This Gift does not want our submission, it simply wants us to try being here, to try not running away from our lives & ourselves.
And so I say ~ step out into the messiness & see it for what it is. For it is not uncommon for our liberation to show itself in the midst of our despondency rather than our bliss. Bliss often feeds the desire for more bliss & thus perpetuates the outer search. Yet in the heart of this hopelessness is the chance to glimpse what has been here all along, if only we will not turn away from it. Find out what is within you, what is you, lying in the heart of your discomfort. There is no where left to search....there is nothing more to do....nothing more to say........
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